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Gender Stress: Preventing Sexual Harassment
By: Mimi Donaldson

When people are asked the question, what stresses you? a seemingly endless gush pours out. To manage your stress, determine which of your stressors are controllable; that is, you have the capacity to change, alter, influence, or minimize their effect on you. One thing that is controllable is your own behavior at work. Creating the proper working environment is everyone responsibility. A hostile environment can result in a loss of productivity. Since litigation of sexual harassment claims can cost the company many thousands of dollars, management cannot afford to ignore such problems if the company is to survive.

What is sexual harassment? The law defines it in two parts:

Quid pro quo; this for that. Simply, job benefit or elimination of job detriment in exchange for sexual favors.

Hostile environment. This means a pattern and practice of unwelcome sexual conduct or requests, whether or not it is directed at a particular person, which creates an intimidating, hostile or offensive working environment that unreasonably interferes with an individuals job performance.

In the first case, the employee must document the conduct and file a complaint right away. The employer is always liable for quid pro quo harassment.

The Mans Role

Since sexual harassment statistics show that 95 percent of the reported cases are male harassing female, this article deals with men as the potential harassers and women as the potential victims. Regarding a hostile working environment, however, there are many gray areas between consensual and coercive behavior. Many harassers do not realize they are doing it. Men are better off when they avoid the Six Deadly Signals that may contribute to their image as a harasser and may sacrifice the team work and camaraderie that are so valuable.

Signal No. 1:

Sexual innuendoes. A male manager in a national media company said to his female supervisor, Relax—do not get your panties in a wad. She went berserk. He could not understand why. He had always told his male employees, Don't get your shorts in a wad.

Signal No. 2:

Honey, baby, sweetie. We are not your wife or daughter.

Signal No. 3:

Exclusionary tactics. Some sports analogies used in business conversation are used to exclude women. To be safe, do not use language some of your listeners may not understand.

Signal No. 4:

Condescending. It may start with, You probably do not know this or it can take the form of interrupting mid-sentence and running over her words.

Signal No. 5:

Touching. A client of mine was reprimanded for touching his female co-worker on the arm while talking to her. When questioned, he said he learned at a communications seminar to touch for persuasive contact. He was told to find another way to be persuasive.

Signal No. 6:

Blocking movement. Some guys think it is fun to tease women by impeding or blocking movement. Men need to know it is not funny unless it is enjoyed by both parties.

The Womans Role

Can women avoid or prevent sexual harassment? Not always. But the victim has a responsibility to herself and the company to nip poor behavior in the bud if she can. When a victim responds with fear or shrinks away, she reinforces the behavior she abhors because the harasser has already gotten away with a small crime.

Lets look at the Six Deadly Signals that may set you up as a victim. These should by no means be construed as putting the blame on the victim, however.

Signal No. 1:

Dressing sexy. What may be comfortable for you may invite unwelcome remarks. I know we have rights, but be realistic. Men are visually aware.

Signal No. 2:

Sexual sharing. Sharing with a man that very funny, risqué joke you heard yesterday may invite one of the off-color jokes he knows and you may not like it. Also, refrain from sharing the intimate details of your date—it sets a tone for sexual sharing.

Signal No .3:

Touching. Some women find it more natural to touch an arm or shoulder to make a point. This may be perceived as being sexual. It is better to keep your hands to yourself if you expect the same.

Signal No .4:

Swearing. I will never forget punctuating a point with a four-letter word and the male manager in my training class turning beet red. He said, in a low, disappointed voice, I thought you were a lady. I lost credibility.

Signal No. 5:

Uncertain speech patterns. The woman who is always hedging kind of, sort of and sounding unsure I am not certain, but ... generally loses credibility. This does not necessarily lead to sexual harassment, but it does make you appear weak and helpless—a perfect target.

Signal No. 6:

Nervous talking. Similar to uncertain speech patterns, when you talk too much, people tend to interrupt you. Interruptions represent power; someone has taken away your right to speak. Do not set yourself up.

If both sexes can consciously avoid the signals, we will reduce our chances of being labeled harasser or harassed. And in the process, we will significantly lessen our stress.

Article Source: http://www.onlineprofitswork.com/articles

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